Only a Dream?

It is not often that I remember my dreams, usually if I do it is because they are so ridiculous that they stand out. For the past few months I have a recurring dream of opening a meeting place for people with depression/mental health illnesses to come and spend their days playing games, meeting folks etc. The Depressed Moose Centre if you will (name might need some work LOL)

I am a pretty spiritual person with strong beliefs in the afterlife and believe that people who have passed on contact you via dreams, in the past my uncles have visited me often to send me messages of support when I have been feeling low.

However the last couple of nights I have had disturbing dreams about my Uncle Ron, for those new to my blog I looked after Ron until his death and it is one of the biggest factors of my depression. The kind of dreams where you wake up and it feels so real that you find it hard to believe it did not happen.

I am sat at his old flat listening to him tell me that I could and should have done more to help him while he struggled and died in hospital. How he blames me for it everything. I woke up yesterday feeling really triggered by the dream, or maybe nightmare would be a better word.

It’s something completely foreign to me as usually my dreams revolve around me Mila Kunis, Cheryl Cole and a bottle of Jack Daniels and baby oil!

Now I am pretty sure in myself that I could not have done anything more for Ron so why almost 3 years since his death am I having these negative dreams/visits. Why when things were starting to look up for me? and why cant I shake the feeling that he is trying to get a message to me?

Have you had experience with these sort of dreams? How do you deal with them? I’m finding it hard to push it out my mind, and with my run coming up in 2 days it is really dragging me down when I should be starting to focus on dragging my body 10 Km!

Any advice welcomed…